thinkings

i feel as though i haven't sat down for a while and wrote what's really going on here, and i'm still pressed for time as i write this. my birthday was nice. had a lot of projects to work on but lindsey made me a cake with lots of delicious frosting and andrea cooked up some tomato bread soup. thanks to everyone who sent me cards it was nice to feel a touch of home. as my birthday has now passed i've been very contemplative. i've struggled with wanting things of home, with feeling content in my design and myself in general. i want to succeed here in rome, and experience what it is i'm supposed to be doing. i want to feel that there is depth in my life not just this surface that most people see. i want to be able to express myself better I WANT TO LEARN. i need to remember all of this as my days pass by. i'm enjoying myself, i have things to look forward to in the weeks to come and it makes the time go by. i'm experiencing God's presence much more evidentally in my days and i'm not sure what the reason is. it's as though sometimes my eyes can just see the world a bit clearer than usual, i get a glimpse of God's creation and how he intended it and how He made us and it makes me smile. i wish i had more time to sit and think and let my mind go.