culmination

This is it, the past four years of my life have been leading up to this; senior portfolio night. Less than a day away.

It hasn't hit me yet that I am graduating, that school will actually be over for ever; that I've basically spent my entire life in a learning institution and now it's over. Weird. I get these random moments where all of a sudden I appreciate something about school, something I will miss that I haven't realized will be gone soon. I've learned a lot in these past four years; a lot about myself, my character, my capabilities. Even, Paula, one of my design professors taught me all about Tabs today in inDesign. I was always a little confused on the correct way to use them and the correct usage of en and em dashes. Now I know. My last day of studio in my senior year and I get it now. Hahaha.

But I will miss the casualty of my classes, that I can come and go as I please, play music during class, go down to the library and flip through design books, hang out in the atrium where I am bound to find someone I know. Walk through the gallery, spend long nights in the basement studios all by myself jamming out to music that no one else will hear, making dresses for school projects.

I see things differently now than I did before I was in design. I went to a lecture the other day with my friend Adrianna. It was a woman speaking about the Chilean poet, Vincent Huidobro and the anatomy of an object. He made beautiful visual paintings for his poetry. I don't think anyone else there understood what she was speaking about but Adrianna and I loved it; talking about serifs and visually what he was representing. It was everything we would learn about in design history and because of our education our minds have been trained to think and understand what she talked about. But for everyone else, they were lost. It's crazy how our thinking and learning capabilities become so specialized.

These are a few of my reflections on the end of my senior year. If I could do it all over again I would still do graphic design but perhaps take more philosophy and religion classes. I've found in my last semester that these are what I am passionate about. My last religion paper I tried to write on the existence and belief in God, and how perhaps it's not such a leap of blind faith. I like that I have been able to write about such things.

Well, for the first time in a while I am getting ready for bed before midnight. Tomorrow is the culmination of our education. It's time to celebrate.